Blog 25-December 2014

Hi everyone.It's been a mad old time since the last blog and so much has happened.

After much deliberation, we decided to return to the UK and we have had a mad old time being back amongst family and friends. We returned to the best welcome possible at the airport with my family making banners and cheering at our arrival. It was all very surreal after a 24 hour flight,and to be back on British soil was strange after all these years.The long,sunny nights messed with our heads for a bit and the boys were missing their usual bedtime by a few hours most nights as we just kept losing track of time (in Oz,its dark by 6pm). The boys didn't complain though!

We hit the ground running and met up with family and friends which was fantastic. There were castle stays,Legoland and theme park visits,a Harry Potter Studios trip,cottage stays and much more. We were kept extremely busy having lots of fun.

Unfortunately,we soon came back to earth with a bump as the news came through from our letting agent that the tenant in our house would not move out.Our hands were tied and we soon found out that tenants clearly have more rights than landlords.We spent the next 5 weeks sleeping on friends mattresses and in my parents 2 bed house whereby they gave up their bed (I was 8 months pregnant,)and they slept on a mattress on their living room floor. The situation was dire and we just couldn't believe what we had come home to. Paul was distraught and neither of us could see an end to the black cloud that seemed to continue to hover over us. The midwife was very concerned about my emotional health as the stress of the past few years was enough,but this was unbelievable. To top it off,I was then diagnosed with gestational diabetes. I was to take my own blood 5 times a day and record it to ensure my blood sugar levels were stable.What else could possibly go wrong??  After living out of 4 suitcases and awaiting for the arrival of our belongings from Australia,we enlisted the advice of a solicitor and started the ball rolling to evict her from the property.This could take 6 months,time we didn't have with a baby on the way in 4 weeks time plus getting the boys settled into a new country and school as soon as we possibly could.Life was stressful again to say the least.
After 5 weeks of being back in England,our tenant finally decided to move out and we moved in. The property wasn't left in the best state but we were just glad to be home.

The boys started school and Tom settled in immediately.Charlie took a little longer but now he can read and write just like his peers,he feels much more confident and settled. Well, as my sister says,he has been fighting to stay alive for the past few years so he had bigger fish to fry. His hospital visits have proven to show that hes keeping the big C at bay but every visit (and bits in between) I worry about the prospect of him relapsing. He's gone through so much,I just want him to have a happy,"normal" life now with no Cancer getting in his way. He's joined Beavers and can now go to a public pool so has lessons and is loving it.

Oh,I nearly forgot to mention.We had a new addition thrown into the mix too.Our amazing,beautiful,miracle of a baby arrived on September 17th, and we named her Amelia Rose Barratt. The 3rd baby I'd always longed for (but had to wait a few extra years for as we had bigger fish to fry)! She is such a welcome addition to our family and the boys adore her.She is the perfect distraction we needed after the hellish years of dealing with Cancer we've had.
Being around family again has been amazing.Seeing the children having so many fun times together with their cousins and arguing like siblings is great. The boys are enjoying the sleepovers they missed out on,the cold weather they forgot about,the cuddles with grandma,grandad,Aunts and Uncles that skype just can't cater for. The time back home has been stressful at times but having family and friends around makes up for that.

Charlie astounds me every single day. I recently made a little folder up for him of all the charity events people did in his honour,blogs I've written,basically all the important things of his cancer journey so he can look back on it when hes older (if he wishes).Reading back at these blogs,it baffles me as to how as a family who just moved to the other side of the world,we coped with the diagnosis that our 2 year old had Cancer and had to endure the horrific treatment he did. I know the answer though. Our boys. Thomas and Charlie are the world to us (and Amelia now too)! and just like any parents would,you have to stay positive and rise to the challenge and believe in them. I will never tire of saying that Charlie is my hero. Seeing what he has endured will never leave me and as a mum,I couldn't be prouder of my boys, including Paul. Cancer has touched us in a way I never thought it would and would never wish on anyone. Life goes on and our lives are going to be fun,positive and memorable. If anything,Cancer has taught us to get on with things,don't sweat the small stuff and live life.

Blog 24-Getting there! What a proud mummy I am

The last few months have been all about decision making for the future and luckily, things just seem to have slotted into place and this has made the choices we've made so much easier. I'm a great believer in fate, and things happening for a reason.

Back in January,we had excitedly booked return flights home for June and set about filling the diary with exciting activities to do with friends and family in the short time we had with them before returning to Oz. Since then however,we have had a few more changes taking place which has lead us to decide to come home for good (well,unless we get itchy feet)! First of all we found out I was pregnant, which is very exciting news. We originally intended to have the baby in Brisbane,but then a couple more things came up which helped to make the choice to return so much easier. Our landlord decided to sell the property we're living in once our lease is up in July which meant that we would need to start looking to move AGAIN. Since being in Oz we have moved 4 times in 3 years and are over it. Along with this,Paul wanted a change in his employment but with Australia being so big,and his line of work quite niche,unless we moved cities,it wasn't going to happen. I think you're starting to get the picture! Along with all these changes,Charlies treatment coming to an end means that we are free to fly and go home so we just decided why not?! Having the baby and being close to family will be a huge plus.There's 3 and a half years of babysitting/sleep overs to be made up for so why wouldn't we rush home?hehe.

To backtrack slightly,Charlie started school at the end of January and he is doing amazingly well.He

Charlie and his home-made wings

isn't an A* student and probably is a little chilled out on the learning front. He's more interested in being a scientist and making experiments out of things he finds in the kitchen or making himself fly with home-made wings or helium balloons (don't ask),but thats Charlie. Paul and myself are just happy that he has managed to settle into school life so well and is a popular class member.The pressure of learning his "golden words" will come later as we're just so proud of the small steps hes making as the last 3 plus years have been tough on his body and mind.  Charlie is so excited to be moving back home as he gets to dig for worms and have his own builders yard like Uncle Rob had.That's Charlie in a nutshell.

Thomas is continuing to flourish and is such an energetic little boy.He began Jujitsu last month and is loving it. He's still as loving and caring as ever and does get very excitable (like a puppy) at times. Moving to Oz has been just as tough a journey for Thomas as the rest of us and not having family around to take him out when Charlies been too unwell for us to go anywhere,is a credit to his caring and understanding nature. When told moving back to the UK was a possibility,Thomas was a little apprehensive as he didn't want to leave his friends but soon came round to the idea when we spoke about all the fun he can have with cousins,friends and exploring "new" areas that he has no recollection of at all. Neither boys have many memories of living in England so they will be in for a lot of surprises when we return (thank god its "summer" when we come back is all I'm saying).They will love it!
Both boys happened to get an award on the same day at school assembly which made me a very proud mum.They were stood there amazed that each other got an award at the same time and kept giving one another the thumbs up.Very funny and cute.

Boys collecting their merit awards at the same time!

This blog wouldn't be right without singing the praises of my amazing hubby.Now this doesn't happen often so listen up! The last few years have been bloody hard and without Paul being there to support me,I wouldn't have got through it the way I have. Paul and myself have worked well as a team and I'm not going to be mushy but just say that he is the best husband and father ever! Even during my "morning sickness" (which should be renamed "all day sickness") he has stepped up and taken over everything I've been unable to do. He really is amazing. Oh,and he's sorted out a job for our return!Superman or what,hehe.

As for me,well I've had my head down the toilet bowl just about every day since being 5 weeks pregnant.(I'm now 14 weeks).It's no fun but I know how lucky we are to be having another baby so its a means to an end. I have a beautiful friend who has 2 young boys and she was sadly diagnosed with stage 3 Lung Cancer a few months ago.Seeing her and what my brave Charlie have gone through allows me to moan about my sickness,but get on with it as its not life threatening.You may find my empathy for some things has wavered a bit since you last saw me,but I think experiencing what we have, not only with Charlie but with other children at the hospital,it's understandable to be a little tougher and not sweat the small stuff.

So,currently we are waiting for Thursday which will start the beginning of the end of Charlies treatment. Charlie had his final lumbar puncture last month and this week its his VERY last chemo in hospital.Phew! He will then be taking his daily chemo at home until April 14th then that is it,remission begins! Once this has completed,the Consultant will book him in for his port-a-cath removing in May. Charlie has increasingly been asking questions about this and is clearly anxious about the prospect of having it removed. He told me he didn't mind keeping it as it would hurt more to get it out. He's also told me it would be good if he could drink something and it just disappeared and the skin healed itself. Unfortunately, he also asked about what happens when people finish their treatment and they return to the country they're from (like everyone who has Cancer is foreign) and it comes back. I've had to chat to him about the fact that its unlikely for it to return but if it did,Dr's in the UK will be keeping a close eye on him and they would need to give him further treatment. Not an easy conversation to have with your 5 year old.

Coming back home will be so exciting but also very sad for us as we have made a new life out here for the 3 years we lived here. We have made amazing friends to share the good and bad times with. As I keep being reminded by a certain friend (cough,Lori) they will always be there if they are real friends.

So,it's onto the next chapter in our life and this will involve packing (again),unpacking (again),moving (again),finding a school,a new home and changing nappies! Wish us luck in our next adventure and we hope to share lots of happy memories with you on our return.

Post 23-A poem of our journey January 2014

 Happy New Year everyone! I hope you all had a fantastic Christmas with lots of celebrations.

I've had a bit of a reflective day today and knowing that Charlies treatment is nearing the end,I wanted to write a poem which encompassed some of the journey of the past 3 years.

I hope you enjoy reading it.You'll realised I'm no poet but the sentiment is there.

                                                  The Big 'C' and our little 'C'

                                                           We chose a life of sun and fun and what did we find?

                                                           Our little monkey Charlie had other things in mind.

We moved from England to Australia only 3 weeks before.

A country in which I had never stepped ashore.

The virus that we thought he had, turned out to be much worse,

This adventure we hoped to have, soon felt like it was cursed.

The Cancer diagnosis was a bolt from out the blue,

If only we had known a month before then we'd never flew!

The port was soon inserted and the treatment it did start,

Paul and me just sat and cried,it really broke our heart.

Our little boy was soon to open our eyes to a new world,

Of Dr's,nurses and the kindness which unfurled.

I was humbled and too proud at times to take on any support,

But soon realised it was crazy to not accept the meals they brought.

With all we knew ten thousand miles away, I started up a blog,

It helped me on those days I found to be a really hard slog.

Thomas was a superstar throughout this bumpy ride,

It can't be easy to see how much his mummy cried and cried.

The worry,stress and upset that he has endured,

Mustn't go noticed for that I have ensured.



School became the backbone to our new and obscure life,

To there we would turn to if we felt we were in strife.

The friends we made along the way were there through thick and thin,

I cant find the words to thank them,just where would I begin?

The terminology we now know to what the Dr's call,

The chemo,robot,roids and more, oh, who wants to know them all?!

Captain chemo became our friend to who would admit to this?

The surreal life we stepped into really took the pi**!

It's been a hellish 3 years of that I can admit,

We are getting through it with determination and grit.

Charlie is the bravest child I have ever known,

The nurses all love him and he keeps us in the “zone”.

He has his chemo every day and needles every week,

If that was me I know that I really would freak!

They say that Cancer consumes your life and this I must agree,

Though we have a lot of fun and laughs to that I make a certainty.

You might be forgiven for thinking that we knew

That moving Down Under our life would be flipped up too.

We're near the end of this nightmare that of which we're hopeful,

The day will come again when we are not so woeful.

The futures bright and rosy, of this I only hope,

A parent staying positive is the only way to cope.

It's still a long long journey but the worst is almost done,

For beyond that final dose of chemo can truly only be fun.

By Lisa Barratt